Directed by Stuart Simpson
Australian filmmaker Stuart Simpson brings us a fun semi-tribute to Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! mixed with a touch of Jaws and From Dusk ‘Til Dawn. Thanks to the folks at Breaking Glass Pictures, his film has made it onto the shores of the States in El Monstro del Mar! Yes the punctuation is part of the title and the translation is “The Monster of the Sea”…but most of you smart readers probably already figured that out.
Beretta, Snowball and Blondie, three psychotic yet extremely sexy chicks out on a rampage of booze, drugs and “man”-slaughter, awaken a mysterious sea creature that has been dormant for several years in the waters of a tiny, desolated shore town. This former hot spot turned sleepy boreville is only occupied by a handful of locals that includes a wheelchair-bound old man and his beautiful granddaughter Hannah (Kyrie Capri). After the old man warns the deadly trio not to go swimming in the water, which of course these bad ass Jezebels completely ignore, the creature begins to decimate the remainder of the town’s population and now has the girls, old man and Hannan in its cross-hairs.
This Aussie import is a flick that is completely crafted for the male demographic. The film stock begins in black and white for quite some time before turning color once things get a bit “colorful” for a duo of unaware horny young men. It's like an evil version of Wizard of Oz. From this point forward, the scantily dressed sirens throw out major foul language, ingest a load of drugs and booze that could kill an elephant and try to corrupt while strangely befriending the virginal, pure as the un-driven snow Hannan.
Capri is very good as the film’s true lead and projects a natural on-screen beauty, but the contrasting Nelli Scarlett, Karli Madden and Kate Watts steal the show with their good looks and dirty behavior. Except Scarlett looks a bit like a drug-fueled skankier version of Khloe Kardashian, sans Lamar Odom. (Note: If the Kardashians are reading this and want to sue The Man-Cave for that reference, get in line!).
El Monstro is only a little over an hour long, but is an entertaining little throwback feature just long enough to not be annoying considering its content. It is also a low budget film whose SFX exposes its shoestring budget, but that does not stop the ambitious Simpson from going for the gusto. After all, the silly effects are all part of its charm as this is not a movie to take too seriously. Even the gory death scenes are shot over a musical score that is not menacing at all and more hokey than anything. It’s a little non-traditional, but it adds to the film’s character. And its lack of effects budget is certainly masked in the exciting finale.
El Monstro del Mar! is available from the Breaking Glass Pictures website (see below) and can be purchased now. Keep your expectations in check, let your hormones run wild and throw your cares away for 72 minutes.
|3.5 out of 5 Creeper Santas|
BREAKING GLASS PICTURES