Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Happy Birthday to Enter The Man-Cave




This post is a little belated because my work week was a mess. I was left with zero time to post anything but a quick review on Pledge Night, let alone follow all my blogs. So without future ado...

Anyone who reads this crazy blog should not be surprised that Enter The Man-Cave's birthday falls on April's Fools Day, but this post is 100% legit. To mark the occasion of ETMC turning one, I wanted to write a quick retrospect on my blog from inception up until today.

The first thing I want to do is express my sincerest thanks to each and every follower on ETMC as well as all of you kick ass people who comment on my posts. You guys really are the "Greatest People on the Planet" just like the label in my side bar states. That's no bullshit. The interactions are what make writing my blog all worthwhile at the end of the day. So again, I want to thank everyone who participates in this little hobby of mine and helps to make it possible by reading and/or commenting. Hopefully you all find me to be just as good of a blogger bud to you as you are to me.

My wife Jules started her blog in late 2008 and kept urging me to do the same. For months, I kept coming up with 100 excuses why I should not start a blog instead of 1 good reason why I should. Don't ask me why or how but one night while bored out of my mind on a business road trip, I finally caved in (pun definitely intended) and hopped on Blogger. So after doing the usual registration, coming up with the blog's name was a difficult task. Being bored and homesick made me wish I was home in my mancave... and that's when it hit me. My blog would be an extension of the things I do at home in my mancave: watch movies, browse the web, think of funny shit, play video games, or really anything that inspired me to be creative in some way.

Since my blog was this "extension of my mancave at home" and I was inviting readers to check out/read my blog, I was essentially asking people to enter the "Man-Cave" (music plays). With all the mancave hype back then, I made my Man-Cave different than others everyone always seemed to talk about by adding the dash and the two capital letters. It was also a funny name because it sounded like something dirty, which I hope does not need to be explained to anyone on here or else you are too young to be reading this blog.

In my first post, I gave an honest overview of the past year in my life. That's how I wanted to start things out, as an honest blog. I put pictures of myself on my sidebar, set up my link to Facebook and anything that would personalize it. The trouble was I didn't know what direction to take or even what the hell to talk about.

Then I thought about the things I love to do the most. For example, I love watching movies in general but I LOVE watching horror movies (no surprise to anyone who frequents this blog), but I wanted to be more than a horror review site. I also did not want write super-serious stuff all the time either because I have enough serious in my life as it is. I'm pretty funny and outgoing in real life and like to make people laugh, so I wanted to bring my personality into my writing.

For the first month, I averaged -1 posts with 4 followers and I was ready to close the cave down just as quickly as I out it up. Then I started reading other blogs and really got sucked into the blogosphere. I started to read material from bloggers that had the same likes as me and those who did not have the same interests but were fantastic writers. This led to me throwing caution out the window in terms of I posted on my blog and just started writing whatever came into my head. It's funny that in preparing this post, I went back for the first time time to read my old posts from April and early May of 2009...and let me tell you that I wish I can have some do-overs. They are pretty bad.

Here is a list of some of my favorite highlights since I opened the doors to ETMC:

- My first "good" posts were reviews of bad movies called Amateur Hour, where I would totally dissect awful b-movies. Having watched USA's Up All Night on the weekends in my youth, I have always been drawn to cheese and campy flicks. But these reviews are not always meant ot be negative. Sometimes they are written about some shitty movies I truly enjoy, like Hard Rock Zombies. I think I can go out on a limb and say that people love reading these reviews which makes me happy because I love writing them just as much. Here's the first one written in ETMC's infancy, the aforementioned Hard Rock Zombies.

- Around mid-summer, my wife's blog had really taken off. She was always telling me how she kept winning giveaways or how she was giving away soemthing to her readers...and I was like "I want to have a giveaway!" When I told her that I was close to 100 posts, she suggested that I have a giveaway to commemorate this accomplishment. So Nick Sayers of The Action Effect won ETMC's first giveaway - a Movie Maniacs figure of Ash from Army of Darkness signed by Bruce Campbell.

- After reading some so-called "professional bloggers'" snobbish and boring columns in the U.S. Airways publication in September, I submitted a sarcastic article to U.S. Airways in order to be published in an upcoming issue. Not surprisingly, I got a rejection letter but the point was that the article was actually written for a ETMC post than a lame U.S. Airways column. The funniest part of the whole thing to me was that the rejection letter meant that someone actually read the ridiculousness I created about a faux women ankle fetish.

- In October of '09, I had my first blogger meetup ever with Allison from the blog allison-writes. Since I went to VA frequently while she was attending grad school in the same area, we got to hang out a few times and somehow get involved in some crazy adventures. Our meetup in December was both surreal and legendary at the same time and I will always treasure the insanity. Yes truth is WAY stranger than fiction. Being one of my first followers, she also gave me my first blog award, the Honest Scrap Award. I passed it on to some great blogs that I followed and it unintentionally brought some traffic and attention back to my blog. So I have the lovely Allison to thank for that...



It's funny that Allison and I have become such great friends in real life, that we rarely comment on each other's blogs anymore. We are always keeping in contact outside the blogosphere.

- During my Christmas vacation, I had a bout with writer's block and didn't have any great ideas on what to post. After having trouble finding an e-mail from a fellow blogger based on all the damn spam clogging in my Inbox, I told my wife that I was going to reply back to these damn solicitors and set them straight. In my response I was going to write some sarcastic shit and humiliate them. Jules told me that if I did that, all I would do is verify my e-mail address with these asshats and welcome more spam. Needing to vent my my frustration, I created a blog post called This Day in SPAM MAIL FAIL!



The rest is history. it seemed to be welcomed and enjoyed by everyone, so I made it a feature. In fact, I was sincerely honored that Jamie from Just the Cheese submitted his own hilarious submission to ETMC last month.

- Finally, another great moment in ETMC's short history was meeting three great bloggers I follow: Johnny from Freddy in Space and Lance and John from Kindertrauma. As a bonus, I met fellow blogger Tenebrous Kate from Love Train for the Tenebrous Empire, which led to me discovering and now reading another blog.


More details of the encounter can be read here.

If I ranked the items in the above list according to importance, the two blogger meetups would be at the very top. Sure it's fun to read and write and all that, don't get me wrong, but meeting people and making new friends were definitely my main highlights since ETMC kicked off. For example, I never would have had the crazy multiple adventures with Allison or I would never be joking with Johnny on how I plan to sneak my beer fridge into Monster Mania if I never started my blog.

In closing, my intention for this post is not to be a "look-at-me" post or "I think I'm the shit" post. That's not how I roll. My blog has become such an important device in my life and that was never the original intention. For me, this was written to re-live the journey to where ETMC stands today and a way to share some older stories with some newer readers.

So join me in wishing my blog a belated happy 1st birthday and I hope there will be 100 more to come. Take care everyone and have a fun weekend!

Amateur Hour: Pledge Night (1990)




So tonight the wife was out so it was "bachelor night". My two final choices for how I was going to spend this wonderful eveing of solitude were
MLB: The Show '10 on my PS3 or Pledge Night. I have been wanting to see Pledge Night for close to 6-7 years after I stumbled upon it on an IMDB "recommendation". Reading the premise just made this sound like one of a real cheesy horror flick 80s style. All I knew was that it had Joey Belladonna (too bad it's a minuscule cameo), music by Anthrax, a 80's B-Horror Movie theme, and frat kids getting slaughtered.


The 1/2 half of the film is like a frat teen comedy

Well that's all I needed to know in order to seek this one down. Because it was an out-of-print VHS film that was not a success by any means, I had to perform many Ebay searches, Yahoo! Auctions, etc. to finally able to land a copy last summer. But then it stayed in my DVD bin 'til a few hours ago. Whoops did I make a wrong choice. I found out that I wasn't missing anything special all this time and maybe my night would have been spent better swinging a virtual bat.


Pledge Night
is the story of pledges who are enduring the suffering of hell week to get acceptance to a fraternity. But their initiation is interrupted by the ghost of former pledge "Acid" Sid, who was killed during a hazing ritual in the 60's. But please let me explain that I am giving the plot more focus then it actually had.


Unfortunately it's not this Pledge Night...



... it's this Pledge Night!


When I say this film is comedy-horror, I literally mean this film is a comedy for 40+ and then takes an extraordinary 180 degree turn and becomes a horror film for the final half hour. A lame horror film but a horror film nonetheless. The funny thing is that you are waiting for the movie to get better once the horror kicks in, but it actually makes the film worse overall. By the time Sid comes up out of the toilet, too much time has been invested into the pledges' trials and tribulations trying to get accepted by the frat. It seems as though the filmmakers were originally making a comedy about college life but then decided that it would be more marketable in the VHS market as a horror flick and switched tracks in production. This deduction comes from the fact that horror in the film is out of place and feels extremely tacked on.


Pledge Night
has to be one of the oddest, worst paced and disjointed films that I have seen in a long time. And I don't expect much structure from my B-movies. So why did I keep watching, you ask? Because I have issues. But also because there were so many unintentionally funny parts that I just had to keep going. For example, where else will you find the most unsympathetic dialogue about the loss of a parent:

Guy 1: "Where's your dad at?"

Guy 2: "My dad died."
(as if it's no big deal)
Guy 1: "When did you lose him?"
(with zero emotion)
Guy 2: "He died when I was born"
(completely monotone and uninterested)

I was waiting for the next line to be something like, "Hey does anyone want ketchup?"


And where else can you find:


...the most nauseating and non-sexy make-out scenes ever committed to celluloid?
...two men in an 80's film that resemble John Mayer and the guy who played Michael Bolton in Office Space but younger and with black hair?
...actresses that speed through their lines?

...those hairstyles in a film nowadays?

...games that include a cherry, a large block of ice and a man's bare ass?

...a pledge that appears to be in his 30's?
... a "pig party" where the supposed "pigs" are better looking than the other attendees

These are many of the reasons that I hung around through the end, but I really should have quit while I was ahead. The villain is nothing but a bootleg, or should I saw Bollywood, version of Freddy Krueger due to his (poorly) harmonized voice and face-palming one-liners based on events in the 60's. For example, when Sid said things such as "That's for Spiro Agnew" and "Which Way to the protest?"...are you kidding me??? There's even a scene with Sid that is straight out of Nightmare on Elm Street 2. Again, just an awful villain.

And don't get me started on the ending. It is the lamest, and I mean the lllaaaammmeeessttttt, ending I have ever had the displeasure of seeing in any horror film. One, it was totally predictable and two, it was unrealistically sappy. The creators must not have known how to end it so they just wrapped it up real fast and called it a day. And I should call it a day as well...


Not this Pledge Night...



...this Pledge Night

The recipe:

1/4 cup Animal House

1/4 cup Nightmare on Elm Street

1/4 cup Ny-tol
Puree for 1-2 minutes, then drink, vomit and re-ingest

The Good:
- Not even 90 minutes
- Joey Belladonna and music by Anthrax
- Spinal cord strangulation

- "I'm not Dan. My name is Sid."...high-larious!

The Devil's Advocate:

- The villain is Bollywood Freddy
- Establishes itself as a comedy then adds the out-of-place horror element
- The horror actually makes the film worse
- One of the worst endings ever in a horror film
- Too many off-screen kills


The Man-Cave's Verdict:

UTTER DRECK!



1 out of 5 Not Men


Avoid even if your curious. That's your final warning.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Moon (2009)




NO SPOILERS

On a flight last spring, I remember reading a "coming this summer" article in EW. Under the notables section was a film called Moon, that the review drew comparisons to 2001: A Space Odyssey as well as making it seem a bit horror-y. So under on my list of features for the summer, I jotted that one down. When the summer came and went, I had completely forgotten all about it. There was zero marketing or promotion for it, so it just skipped my mind. One blog that I read (can't remember which one right now) brought it up over the winter and it made a spark go off in my mind, only to just slip away again. Fast forward to a few nights ago in the video store, there was one copy of 6 left for Moon and ten copies of the one I originally went in there for, Pandorum. So I selected Moon and hoped I didn't make a mistake.

Knowing zero information about this film except that Sam Rockwell was in it and that Kevin Spacey played the voice of some robot, I was extremely surprised about the type of film I watched. About 30-35 minutes in, there is a whopping plot twist...so no spoilers.

The story is about Lunar Industries employee Sam Bell who is two weeks away from finishing up his three-year contract mining on a celestial body. Bell performs these duties for his organization alone at a lunar base with zero interactivity with anyone from the outside world. His only companionship lies with a A.I. bot named GERTY, voiced by Academy Award winner Kevin Spacey.


GERTY (Kevin Spacey)

Bell is amped up to finally get home to Earth in order to see his wife Tess (Dominque McElligott) and little girl Eve (Rosie Shaw). It is basically what motivates him to keep going everyday and not lose his sanity by being alone in the deepest and darkest parts of outer space.

He begins having weird visions, but he is not sure if they are hallucinations or not. No support is offered by GERTY, so he is unable to receive any gratification. Insistent that he saw someone walking around the lunar surface, Bell gets in an accident and wrecks his mobile transport while investigating. When he wakes up back at the station, completely unscathed, he realizes that something deeper is happening on the moon and everything is not as it seems.


The mock Lunar Technologies commercial at the film's beginning had a Cyberdine-like feel

That is all I am telling you. I recommend a lot of films on here, but I urge you to check this one out when you get a chance. It is a sin that more people probably know about the G.I. Joe film but I am sure have never heard of this picture.

While I am recommending this to you all, I would like to give anyone who watches this a heads-up that this is sci-fi, not action sci-fi or a horror sci-fi. Also, the film is methodical and slow-paced and even I was regretting my decision at first. After reading the brief description of the film, I had allusions of a horror-suspense type of film, but this was the polar opposite. And that's not a bad thing in this sense. I just needed to adjust which I was quickly able to do.

I would even gamble to state that this film should have received multiple major Oscar nominations. One in particular would be Best Actor for Sam Rockwell. Whether or not he should have won it, he should have at least been mentioned in the "conversation", so to speak. I can't be too specific on why without spoiling major points in the film, but you will understand once you see it. Glad to see he is billed to be in the upcoming Iron Man 2 because he has the talent to be in big time projects. I thought he was great in the recent Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, but I didn't even realize it was him until after I finished watching this one.


Rockwell should have easily gotten at least a Best Actor nomination

The other mention should have been Best Director for Duncan Jones. The son of David Bowie (yes the Ziggy Stardust Space Oddity himself) really made a fantastic picture in his full length feature debut behind the lens. His work here has me curious to see what he will do in his future projects Mute and Escape From the Deep, which I don't know too much about at this point of time. Unfortunately I could not rent the Special Edition DVD of Moon which contained Whistle, his 2002 short that seems to have gotten some nice reviews as well.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Amateur Hour: Nacho Mountain (2009)


DAMMIT!!SHE'S NOT IN THE MOVIE! STRIKE ONE!


In one of his Monster Mania posts, Johnny from Freddy in Space stated that if you are going to distribute a film at a convention, go to the hotel bar. Guess where we both were when the creators of Nacho Mountain came around to peddle their wares? Exactly. Guess how much we were drinking when they got to our table? Exactly. Guess what happened when they brought around a hot chick decoy to weaken the male senses? Exactly. Well played, gentlemen. While they exchanged their stories of interning at Troma, I jokingly told them that they should actually be giving me some loving and attention because I am the one who is probably going to review their film. $20 later, the creators sold us 2 DVDs and two posters. I laughed with glee how I just bought an Amateur Hour review for ETMC while Johnny jokingly tried to pawn off his copy to my friend Dan. He's probably used his copy as a beer coaster, while I am put my copy in my DVD player the other night after coasting for some beer. And the one weird guy who was REALLY trying to get a picture of Johnny's girl for the website? Well that was just fucking bizarre. No other way to express it than that.


What was I talking about? Oh yeah the DVD I bought!

So let me all tell you that I have been to the top of Nacho Mountain and it's not as bad as I thought it was going to be. But don't get me wrong...I'll never watch it again. It's exactly the type of movie you would expect looking at its DVD's cover...


For those who missed it at the top

Nacho Mountain is the story of one man's quest into the realm of underground competitive eating. So the question is: has there ever been a film solely focused on competitive eating before? No seriously I'm asking because I'm too lazy to research it. If there is, I don't think I have seen it. So points for originality.

The film opens with our lead Keefer (Jay Larson) getting canned from his job for looking at some filthy ass websites (with some very creative names) only to go home and catch his chick getting doggie-style railed by a tranny. After getting hassled by the Mayor's cop henchmen, one who seems to be doing a terrible Sheriff Buford T. Justice impression, Keefer meets up with his bud Meegosh (Kevin Interdonato) but more on that later. And yes I said Meegosh, the same name as the character in Willow.

Meanwhile, the film's antagonist Mayor Fingstal (John Charles Hunt) leads a wellness program to rid the city of all fast and junk food. This forces Meegosh to
hold underground "Fight Club" eating competitions. Based on his extraordinary talent for food consumption since childhood, Meegosh convinces Keefer to enter his contests and use his gift to earn some extra money.

Some of Keefer's competition have gimmicks like pro wrestlers, my favorite being "Entree The Giant". Now that was really funny in all honestly. There's also another competitor called King Mayo who wears a damn paper Burger King-like crown and eats scoops of mayo with his hands before his match begins. The other competitors were funny as well, but these two stuck in my memory.

When Fingstal, a former eating champion himself, gets a tip on the eating competitions, he and the his two goofy cop henchmen bust our heroes and shut the competition down. Then in typical 80's fashion, Keefer and Meegosh challenge Fingstal to a loser-leaves-town match and use the greatest food competition in the land, the Nacho Mountain, as the stage. So now we know what the film's title means. The only problem is that not only does Fingstal's eating skills equal Keefer's, but the fact that they must eat nachos exposes Keefer's only food consumption Achilles heel - spicy food! I won't spoil the rest.


Not this Nacho Mountain


Not this Nacho Mountain...


And I wanted to save a small section in my review for Keefer's love interest Georgia Brown, played by Christina Pazcoguin. Sure she's only in it for like 5 minutes and cannot act her way out of a paper bag (it's laughably bad), but damn is this woman hot! I lean more towards blondes, so for me to say that is a major compliment to her. And if you happen to stumble upon this Christina, sorry about the "acting paper bag" thing, goes with the Amateur Hour review territory and all, but I hope you will consider being Mrs. Man-Cave if something unfortunate happens to my wife. Oh and also if Tanith Belbin and little Amber M. from the Bad Girls Club decide to pass, then you are totally next in line. You'd definitely be like in the top-5. Just wanted to kinda throw that out there. ;)


Look everyone! Stalker pics.


See? drools...

The film's acting is not the greatest but works for this level of film. Highlights are Larson,
Interdonato and Hunt who are funny enough to keep the film moving. And of course there's Pazcoguin's fine ass self. The running time is short which is good for a film of this caliber and after meeting the director, he even admitted that the joke is fart joke-level humor. It's not made to be serious and never attempts to be starting from the first 15 seconds of the film through to the end.

Nacho Mountain is the type of film you would enjoy after some smoke and drinks watching it on a late, late evening. In fact, if USA UP ALL NIGHT was still on, this would definitely be in heavy in their rotation. This film made me really feel like I was watching a new age version if a film they would show on there. I can just hear Gilbert Godfreid saying, "Now we return to...Nacho Mountain."

Time wrap things up on the most expensive edition of Amateur Hour to date...


The Good


> When his girlfriend tries to tell Keefer what happened, Larson's repeated reaction of "What...the fuck...was...that?!" towards the tranny is pretty funny.

> Interdonato saying grace at dinner for more "pussy". He really gets into it.

> The eating competitons are actually well paced and as stated before, the gimmick characters are amusing

> The fact that I felt like I was watching a low brow comedy on USA Up All Night

>
Everyone looked like they had a BLAST making this film.


Devil's Advocate:

> The cop henchmen were played poorly and they annoyed me


> The drug dealer would have had some funny moments if he didn't overact
> It has zero re-watchability

> Sometimes the jokes were funny but then they dragged on and killed the mood

> It's a low budget film, so with it goes the low quality of acting and film stock

> It's not worth the $10 I paid, poster or not. Maybe $5. Hey don't judge me, we are all in an economical crisis nowadays


The Verdict:

Unless you are a fan of cheesy b-movies and did not grow up watching USA Up All Night:




Utter Dreck



...but of you like fart jokes and cheesy b-movie comedy trash...



...then I give it three out of five cheesy nacho mountains


To be nice to the filmmakers: if anyone lives in the East Greenville, PA area, and wants to see the film in theaters, it can be seen with Avatar and The Tooth Fairy at The Grand Theater tomorrow on Sunday 3/28/10. Click this link for details.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Guest SPAM MAIL FAIL Contributor:




On Tuesday, I offered a chance for readers to send me their SPAM MAIL FAIL submissions and I promised to post them in the 'Cave. Seeing only two comments really made me think this was more fail than the pizza giveaway, but someone stepped up and offered their steel in my battle against the Spammers.

That one would be POWDERED TOAST MAN from
Just the Cheese. His site is definitely one you should check out, especially to play "The Movie Game". I'm pretty good at trivia and his ass stumps me every time, so it's definitely a real mind knocker!

Here is Powdered Toast Man's hilarious offer and remember to check out Just the Cheese:


FROM THE DESK OF,MR.JULIUS GULL.
DIRECTOR AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING UNIT, AFRICAN DEVELOPEMENT BAKN.(A.D.B) OUAGADOUGOU -BURKINA FASO.

Dear Friend, This message might meet you in utmost surprise, however,it's just my urgent need for foreign partner that made me to contact you for this transaction. I am a banker by profession from Burkina faso in west Africa and currently holding the post of Director Auditing and Accounting unit of the bank.I have the opportunity of transfering the left over funds ($15.5 million) of one of my bank clients who died along with his entire family on december 2003 in a plane crash. Hence,i am inviting you for a business deal where by this money can be shared between us in the ratio of 60/40 and 60 for me while 40 is for you .

If you agree to my business proposal.further details of the transfer will be forwarded to you as soon as i receive your return mail. have a great day. Yours Faithfully MR.JULIUS GULS NB, MAKE SURE YOU KEEP THIS TRANSACTION AS YOUR TOP SECRECT AND MAKE IT CONFIDENTIAL TILL WE RECEIVES THE FUND INTO THE ACCOUNT THAT YOU WILL PROVIDE TO THE BANK. DONT DISCLOSE IT TO ANY BODY IN YOUR COUNTRY "PLEASE", BECAUSE THE SECRECY OF THIS TRANSACTION IS AS WELL AS THE SUCCESS OF IT. BEST REGARDS MR.JULIUS GULL


His reply


Dear Mr. Sea-gull,


This email might meet you in more utmost surprise. I am very intrigued in your proposal. I am so relieved that you are a banker by profession and that you don’t do it as a hobby. I, myself am a banker by hobby, I dabble in Monopoly banking (foreign and domestic). There must be a surplus of funds in the banks in Burkina Faso. I have received numerous emails regarding extra funds from plane crashes that can be bestowed upon me if I just reply with some information. I must say Julius, if I can call you that, I feel that we are pretty good chums at this point, it sounds too good to be true.

For a professional banker and the director of auditing and accounting, you have terrible grammar and spelling. ‘Yours Faithfully MR.JULIUS GULS NB,’ I didn’t realize we were on a spiritual level now. You don’t even know how to spell your own fake name, is it Gull or Guls? I have no clue what the ‘NB’ stands for either. I am going to guess Not British. ‘THE SECRECY OF THIS TRANSACTION IS AS WELL AS THE SUCCESS OF IT’, I’m not sure what this means, it must be professional banker lingo. Last time I checked ‘bank’ wasn’t spelled ‘BAKN.’ Unless that is short for baking, then I give you my deepest apologies.

If this “proposal” is soooo top secret than why are you sending it in an email? Shouldn’t it be hand delivered by a covert operative disguised as a mailbox or something? Aren’t you worried about hackers finding about our deal? No, no Jules, no dice! I want 50%, this 60/40 deal isn’t going to cut it for me. I don’t give my bank account information out for anything less than $8 million. I also need to meet you in person Mr. Gulliver’s Travels. I was already planning a random trip to West Africa next week so I will just stop by the AFRICAN DEVELOPEMENT BAKN.(A.D.B) and we can talk in extreme secrecy. NOW DON’T TELL ANYONE THAT I AM COMING TO MEET YOU, THIS INFORMATION CANNOT BE DISCLOSED TO ANYBODY, IT IS TOP SECRET AND VERY CONFINDENTIAL.

Truly yours,
Mr. X (I can’t reveal my real name)

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Enter The Cap-tion (3/24/10)

Most Overused Horror Plot Device


I wonder if they all use 3G?

thanks to Michael at I Think It's Interesting


Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Banned From Twitter (3/23/10)




Thanks to Allison from Allison-Writes for this!

Submit your own SPAM MAIL FAIL!




Since 2006, I have been a victim of Inbox abuse by the evil spam scammers who afflict millions every day. In 2010, I decided to fight back! In the ongoing unholy war against the SPAM scam that floods my e-mail constantly, I need help! Ok enough of the sarcastic drama already. I have been batting an idea in my head for the last couple weeks, but wasn't sure whether to pull the trigger or not. But then I decided, eh what the hell. This idea could be a fun vehicle to go a little interactive for my readers in the 'Cave.

The wacky SPAM MAIL FAIL featured posts seem to be a highlight of my blog and enjoyed by many readers. So if you would like, you can send your own submissions to ETMC and the best of the best will be published. All I ask is that you follow the same format as I use and most of all...have fun doing it! Examples of format are here, here and here. Remember that anything goes: cursing, adult humor, complete insanity, whatever.

What would you get in return besides a plug for your site? Well, if you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. So you'll have that going for you, ya know. If you are interested, please e-mail me your submissions at gcap2719@yahoo.com.

I am not sure what kind of volume this interactive trinket will generate, but I look forward to any and all submissions that come my way. Take care.

Monday, March 22, 2010

FREE TONY'S PIZZA COUPONS!!!!




Yes, I said Free Pizza Coupons...for you! Please read on...


Tony's Pizza has contacted Enter The Man-Cave in order to help promote their latest crispy crust brand pizza. Why? I dunno...but I do love pizza, so I'm like "Bring It"! The company gave me several free coupons to try out their pizza and then write a post about the product. This is fine by me because the wife and I love our frozen pizza on movie nights. But we have been hitting the gym like pro athletes since January so we are weary of eating things that will re-expand our waist lines. Luckily, these pizzas contain no trans fat and are baked not fried...which are two major bonuses right there. But the most critical question is how do they taste?

Let me preface by stating that you all know I am Honest Abe and I tell it like it is on this site whether people like it or not. That goes for production companies, celebrities, spammers, and that goes for Tony's Pizza too. Jules and I picked up our samples and these things tasted incredible, especially where frozen pizza is concerned. When we went to the store to pick up our freebies, we learned that Tony's Pizza is produced by Schwan's, the same company that makes Red Baron and Freschetta, which we have eaten before and are both banging pies! This was looking promising.


Over the past few days, we tried the Cheese, Pepperoni and Supreme topped pizzas. My favorite pizza was Supreme while Jules preferred the Pepperoni pizza the best. Other major factors that really made me enjoy these pizzas:


1) They were delicious and inexpensive


2) The crust really is crisp and crusty. There is truth in that claim.


3) They are big enough to be a meal in itself or as a hearty in-between snack, which is good for someone like me who needs to keep my metabolism going throughout the day.


Ok, ok. I'm sure you're saying, "We get it. It's good food and now I'm hungry. Give me my free pizza coupon!"




There are a few minor things you have to do in order to qualify as I only have five FREE PIZZA COUPONS to distribute. The more you do, the more "chances" you get:


1) Click on this link to head over to
Tony's Pizza site and look at the flavors in the "NEW! Crispy Crust Pizza" section under "Products" at the top.

2a) Follow Tony's Pizza on Twitter:
http://twitter.com/tonyspizzas and "@ message" to let them know @gcap2719 from Enter The Man-Cave sent you.

and/or


2b)
Become a fan on Facebook and send them a message that you were sent by Geofree Capodanno at Enter The Man-Cave.

3) Please leave me a comment letting me know all of the steps you completed and what is the flavor you think you'll like the most.
This way I can properly tally your chances to win.

Again, I only have five of these FREE PIZZA COUPONS left, so the more you participate, the more chances you have to win.

The rules might seem excessive, but this data is important in product marketing and I respect that being in the industry. PLUS YOU GET A FREE PIZZA COUPON! I'm even footing the shipping and handling costs as well as the packaging.


FINAL DEADLINE TO ENTER IS FRIDAY, APRIL 2nd. AND PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHICH STEPS YOU COMPLETED IN YOUR COMMENT TO ME.

Good luck and happy free pizza coupon hunting!

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Looking to start a Horror Meetup Group in the PA/NJ/DE area

UPDATED! I said "what the hell" and posted a listing for it on Craigslist, Twitter and here (now) to see if anyone wants to join:

http://philadelphia.craigslist.org/grp/1654994272.html

My wife told me about some "meetup group" site the other day, which is where a group of people with the same interests gather together and do some fun activities. She asked me to take a look at the groups in our area to see if any interested me. After having a positive experience meeting with fellow bloggers/horror fans last weekend at Monster Mania, I thought it would be cool to join one...if one actually existed. Surprisingly, I found a group for every subject for just about anything you can think of but there are ZERO horror groups in the PA/DE/NJ area! What fucking blasphemy!!!


So immediately, I created a Horror Group for the site to see if I could get people to join. I went through the trouble of developing a group name and list of activities for the group to partake in, starting things slow with one event per month. Then I got to the end and was hit with a bill of $80 for six months just to sign the group up...WTF?! I don't even know if anyone would sign up for it, so that's a bit of an investment which could lead to a big waste of money..

So before I drop and potentially waste $80 on some website, I figure I could try to reach out using ETMC as a little outlet in the world to gain some sample data. And if this garners any real attention, I intend on moving full speed ahead and turning this idea into a reality.

Some of the activities that the group could participate in:

1) Meet for dinner and/or drinks and talk horror or b-movies
2) Reserve a theater for exclusive "group-only" screenings of new release and older films.
3) Attend local horror conventions together.
4) Any other cool yet reasonable idea that someone can come up with.

The group would have one fun event per month and then maybe more if things take off.

Again, if you are interested please leave a comment/e-mail me (gcap2719@yahoo.com), or leave a comment if you have any feedback on this topic at all.

Lastly, if you do know of a horror group to join in my area, please contact me with that information as well.

Thanks in advance for whatever you can offer
.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Rewind Review: Super Fuzz (1980)





"There's a cop...
do you see..
and he looks
like every cop on the street.
you will discover...
you can't judge this cop by his cover!"

Back in the early 80's, Super Fuzz was a staple on HBO. It seemed that every time I turned on the cable channel, Super Fuzz was playing and that was fine by me. Every time I hear the term Super Fuzz or see something like a picture of it, I get very nostalgic and I even hear the theme music (above) start playing in my head. Yeah I know it's crazy, but that's just how it is. In fact, I even went back to re-edit this part of my review after I saw a picture over on when is evil cool? a couple weeks back. This pic...


One of his powers includes surviving the poison tooth from Dune

Super Fuzz is about young Miami police officer Dave Speed (Terence Hill) who develops super powers after exposure to a NASA experimental rocket explosion. Soon he is able to run as as fast as cars, catch bullets in his teeth (see above), walk on water, see through solid objects, and blow bubble gum bubbles the size of hot-air balloons. The only problem is that he loses his powers at real inconvenient times which lead to some hilarious results. It takes him a majority of the film to figure out what his own "kryptonite" is: he loses his abilities anytime he sees the color red. The color red was the same color as the explosion, so that technically gave him his powers, but now the color takes them away.


He hates when she gives him the ole' blank stare

Speed and his veteran partner Sgt. Willy Dunlop (Ernest Borgnine) set out to stop a counterfeit money tycoon Torpedo (Marc Lawrence) and his henchmen. One of them happens to be an aging starlet Rosy Labouche (Joanne Dru), who Dunlop has an uber crush on and really complicates matters.


Take a look...at da' bad guys!

In 2007, I got my hands on a recently released copy of the 2005 DVD. After not having seen the film in close to 15 years, my memories of a funny superhero flick was prevalent in my mind. But I was extremely worried that I would now see the film it in a totally different way...which I did. But I would not necessarily say that I now see it in a bad way at all.

The film is not a great one by any means. The acting is not the best, the film itself is extremely dated and the film stock is not helped by DVD enhancement. But that stuff aside, this is a major cheese-fest and I am proud to say that love it for being so, much like Hard Rock Zombies. And like Hard Rock Zombies, this film never takes itself seriously. The physical comedy and situations are pure sharp cheddar! It is a strange take on the superhero film genre mixed with comedic elements by Italian director Sergio Corbucci.


Don't look so surprised, Borgie. You were definitely in it.

The structure of the film is setup as one major flashback. Speed is on death row and being led to the electric chair after eating an enormous amount of baked beans (wow what a way to go out!). He cannot believe how things were going so well for him and now he was headed to his death. The rest of the film is told in a flashback format until things come full circle with him being charged for the death of officer and friend Dunlop. He gets strapped in the electric chair and sees that Rosy was kind enough to send him a large floral arrangement of red roses. Instructions are that the roses must be in the same room as him when they pull the switch. Nice.

There's just some kind of charm this film has that makes me love it, cheesy or not. I don't know if it's the slapstick comedy, how angry Dunlop gets at every little thing Speed does for no reason at all, or the sound byte that plays from the theme song every time Speed uses his powers: "Soopa-soopaaaaah!" Or maybe it's the scene where you have to suspend belief (even though it's in a superhero movie) when Speed first gains his powers. So NASA would be blowing up rockets over the Everglades (the Glades are not that big to be doing something that dangerous) in a secret experiment that's so secret, the cops know about it. And the reason that Dunlop accidentally sends Speed there in the first place, besides being pissed at him, is to serve a parking ticket to a man who lives on a small reservation on a little island. An island that is so desolate, Speed needs to use a canoe to get there. When he arrives on said island, there's no cars anywhere. WTF did he park to get a parking ticket since he didn't have a car?! It's obvious he needs a boat to get around. Did the man tie up his boat in a tow away zone? Did he pull his raft too far onto shore? That is something I never really picked up on as a kid but made me laugh my ass off when I watched it recently.

I didn't realize this when I was younger, but lead actor Hill was a a pretty big star in Italy with a good-sized fan following based on his string of Italian spaghetti westerns spoofs. His most popular of that subgenre is My Name is Trinity. And the man was 49-50 at the time of shooting Super Fuzz! 49 years old?! Is he a vampire? Wow does this man have some great genes and I hope I look that good when I'm his age.


50 years old? "Count" Hill drinks the blood of the young

It was a nice stroll down memory lane to see this film again and a weird feeling to enjoy it on a whole different level. Again, it's flawed but it's still goofy fun. B-movie cheese to the umpteenth degree. If you watched it and liked it as a kid, please don't feel afraid to walk down that road again. For the newcomers, don't set the bar too high and expect a silly ride.

Friday, March 19, 2010

Friday's FAIL: Edited For Television!

I understand FCC regulations, acts, laws, and all that good stuff, but sometimes offensive language "edited for television" airings is just ridiculously hilarious. You know what I mean right? When they take a film like Scarface and edit every time Tony says "Fuckin'" to say "Freakin'". It sounds absurd and dubbed in as all hell but it needs to be done due to communications regulations.

So I'm sure you're like "Thanks for the lesson, Captain Obvious!", but allow me to explain why I even bring this up today.

Silence of the Lambs was on AMC the other day and Jules left it on while I was blogging. I hate edited-for-TV versions of films, but I made an exception for her in this case because I love this film. We joined the film in progress when Hannibal makes his big escape from his holding cage. The gore was edited, no biggie there.

So you know the scene where Buffalo Bill (Ted Levine) is wearing his victims skins, dancing around to Goodbye Horses and sporting a Mangina? You better remember because it's my favorite scene of the film. It's like the funniest shit ever. Here's a clip for the unaware.

CAUTION: MANGINA is at the end of clip!



Ok so right before the Mangina incident, remember when the shot is a closeup of his lipstick smeared lips...and he said, Would you fuck me?" Then he answers himself, "I'd fuck me. I'd fuck me so hard!" Take a minute and get that thought in your mind before continuing...

Well the editing team decided to redub those lines to the following:

Goodbye Horses plays in the background, with a close-up on Levine's lips...

"Would you marry me?"
"I'd marry me."
"I'd marry me SO hard!"


LOL!!!!!! Marry? Of all the words, they picked "marry"? That doesn't even make any sense.

What about: "love me" or "hug me" or "do me" or even "f' me"?

And then they just go on to cut the remainder of the scene after he starts dances for 2 seconds. They should have just cut the whole damn scene out altogether instead of this patch job! This is what I mean when I say Edited-for-Television FAIL, because this was just way too damn funny and I put my headphones on after that.

Now a good example of Edited-for-Television content is the TV version of Return of the Living Dead. The back of character Freddy's (Thom Matthews) jacket in the original film states "Fuck You!" but in the TV version the jacket states "TV Version". Wish I had a screen cap to share but I don't.

Just a random thought and complaint. Enjoy your FAIL-less Friday!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

The NYC Horror Film Festival's Killer Short Sudden Death Competition begins in Anaheim at Wizard World



Wow! I must sound like a damn catalyst for Wizard World, but I found this while getting information on the Bruce Campbell signing in June and figured that it deserved its own post. Honestly, I'm not trying ot be their PR man or anything. By the way Wizard World con coordinators, please send my check to: ETMC P.O. Box ### Philadelphia, PA...just kidding!

This horror short film festival/contest is starting in Anaheim, CA on April 16-18 and continuing throughout the summer at the various Wizard World conventions. This could entice me to attend Philly's con even more than Bruce Campbell because this sounds pretty freakin' sweet. I won't reiterate, so please take a look at the offical press release below...



NEW YORK and ANAHEIM, Calif., March 15, 2010 - From Frankenstein to Halloween to Saw, horror films have been a staple for moviegoers for generations. Now, fans attending Wizard Comic Con events in 2010, beginning next month in Anaheim, Calif., can take part in The NYC Horror Film Festival's Killer Short Sudden Death Competition, in which short filmmakers will have their work viewed by a live audience and voted into the NYC Horror Film Festival program later this year. Comic Con audiences will have the opportunity to select one winner at each of six 2010 Wizard Conventions - Anaheim (April 16-18), Philadelphia (June 11-13), Chicago (August 19-22), Philadelphia (June 11-13), New England (Oct. 1-3), Big Apple (October 7-10) and New Jersey (Oct. 15-17) - that will become part of the 2010 NYC Horror Film NYC Festival program later this year.

The competition is part of the Horror Pavilion, to be featured at Comic Con shows beginning at Anaheim. Aspiring filmmakers are invited to submit their work for consideration at each show.

"The addition of the Film Competition to the Wizard Comic Con series gives attendees who love horror an early look at some new works from talented filmmakers, and the chance to choose which they like best," said Gareb Shamus, Wizard Entertainment CEO. "We are always trying to bring unique programming to our Comic Con tour,."

NYC Horror Film Festival's Killer Short Sudden Death Competition is the ultimate horror and sci-fi short film series where the audience selects the winners. The brain child of Joe Mauceri and Michael J. Hein, festival director of the NYC Horror Film Festival, The Killer Short Sudden Death Competition was first held at the Monster Mania convention, August 2009. The audience winner was a short from the Dublin-based company First Quarter Films, Wheels of Death, directed by Edward & Rob Kennedy.

In six major cities, the competition offers filmmakers a unique opportunity to have their short films screened and voted on by hundreds of fans, and a chance to win a coveted programming slot at the 2010 NYC Horror Film Festival's Killer Short Sudden Death Competition. Submissions will be accepted on the following schedule:

Anaheim Comic Con. April 16-18, 2010:
Via the mail beginning February 15, 2010 and post marked no later than April 5, 2010
On site beginning April 16, 2010, until 2:00 pm Saturday, April 17, 2010.

Philadelphia Comic Con. June 11-13, 2010:
Via the mail beginning April 9, 2010 and post marked no later than May 28, 2010
On site beginning June 11, 2010, until 2:00 pm Saturday, June 12, 2010.

Chicago Comic Con Aug. 19-22, 2010:
Via the mail beginning June 14, 2010, and post marked no later than Aug. 2, 2010
On site beginning Aug. 19, 2010, until 2:00 pm Saturday, Aug. 21, 2010.

New England Comic Con Oct. 1-3, 2010:
Via the mail beginning Aug. 30, 2010, and post marked no later than Sept. 24, 2010
On site beginning Oct. 1, 2010, until 2:00 pm Saturday, Oct. 2, 2010

Big Apple Comic Con October 7-10, 2010:
Via the mail beginning August 4, 2010, and post marked no later than Sept. 29, 2010
On site beginning Oct. 7, 2010, until 2:00 pm Saturday, Oct. 9, 2010.

New Jersey Comic Con October 15-17, 2010:
Via the mail beginning August 11, 2010, and post marked no later than Oct. 06, 2010
On site beginning Oct. 15, 2010, until 2:00 pm Saturday, Oct. 16, 2010.

For information on submitting to the Killer Short Sudden Death Competition, please contact Michael J. Hein at (201) 666-6729 or NYCHorrorFest@aol.com, or Joseph B. Mauceri at (917) 604-4878 or jmauceri@fearsmag.com.

Anaheim Comic Con brings together fans of comics, toys, collectibles and offers a chance to see actors, writers, artists and the best each industry has to offer.
For more Anaheim Comic Con guest and programming updates, become a fan of ANAHEIM COMIC CON on Facebook!

The Anaheim Comic-Con runs from April 16-18, 2010 at the Anaheim Convention Center. It is a major regional pop culture convention bringing fans the latest information on comics, toys, collectibles and connecting attendees with celebrity guests, artists and industry professionals. Anaheim Comic-Con is produced by Wizard Entertainment.

END PRESS RELEASE

Link for further info

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Bruce Campbell is coming to Philly for Wizard World con in June




Convention season is upon us again and a notable actor will be doing a signing in the area at Wizard World. The immortal deadite asskicker himself Bruce Campbell will be signing autographs for one day only during Wizard World on Saturday, June 12th.

I have only been to Wizard World one time with some friends back in 2005, but it was pretty good time. Don't know if I can make it to this year's event, but if you are in the area and have not met Campbell in real life, please make the trip down to see him. I have been lucky enough to meet him a handful of times and each has been a great experience. One of the first items he ever signed for me was included in ETMC's first giveaway back from over the summer. This is when he still looked more like Ash during that time and not like Sam from Burn Notice (j/k)...but it's still Bruce F'n Campbell!!

I still have the giant-sized voice-activated Army of Darkness Ash figure (discontinued) that I would love to have signed but it's a bit of an albatross to be lugging around downtown Philly. This would make the 5th time I would meet The Great One, but we'll see.

Here is a special message from Bruce for his fans and the show's attendees:

"Hey gang, I look forward to tormenting you all at Wizard - and because I am a big fan of Philly, here is a special offer: $10.00 to any person in my autograph line with an Evil Dead, Ash or Tom Cruise tattoo!”

How can anyone turn that kinda offer down?

If anyone is heading down there, give me a shout and maybe I will become inclined to rough it out.
For those of you who are interested, here is a link to the site below where you can pre-purchase tickets.

Bruce in Philly June 12th!

More info on the convention


And "The Shat" William Shatner is listed as attending as well. But if you are interested in seeing him, I would double-check on that. Their site and listings are a bit confusing. For example, if you click on William Shatner, it states he is going to be at two other cons besides the one in Philly, but is listed in the sidebar as an attendee in Philly. ???? So double-check that...but Bruce WILL definitely be in house.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Heavy Metal Remake Back On? Big Directors Named!




I stumbled across this news on 411mania. After Paramount dumped the remake, Dave Fincher is trying to keep his film alive by bringing aboard some big time directors. While I'm not a remakeaholic, I would love to see a new Heavy Metal on the big screen. Just as long as it has original stories that are not like the sequel or actual remakes of the original's segments, especially my beloved B-17.
3D could maybe be a good idea with this film, even though the gimmick is at overkill right now.


Check out article below...



David Fincher Aiming To Get Heavy Metal Moving

Posted by Chris Lansdell on 03.12.2010



According to a report, David Fincher is fighting to keep his remake of Heavy Metal a reality after Paramount dropped it. The report says that Fincher has both James Cameron and 300's Zack Snyder set to each direct a segment of the film, with Fincher himself directing a third. The film will also be in 3D animation.

Fincher is now actively looking for financing and a distributor, which with names like Cameron and Snyder attached should be a lot easier. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles co-creator Kevin Eastman, who was also the publisher of Heavy Metal magazine, was previously attached to direct one of the film's 8 or 9 segments, as was Tim Miller of Blur Studios. It is not known if either man is still involved


END ARTICLE




BTW - Ever see the South Park Heavy Metal episode?

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Monster Mania 14 (2010) recap or How ETMC went to "Space" and was "Trauma"-tized!

I came in through my front door followed by Dan with his six-pack of Smirnoff Ice. Dan said, "Dude that was so much fun. When is the next one?" My wife met us in the living room, "You guys sure look like you had fun. Why do you have two pizzas in your hand and Geof, why are you wearing a shirt that has 'OBEY!' on it? Did you join a cult?" I told her, "Well I knew you were hungry and I admit to knocking back a few rounds of beer, so I'm really hungry too. I didn't eat all day. And this is not a t-shirt, it's a Fright Rag. Huge difference!" She said, "So from the way you're acting, let me guess...they had Blue Moon on tap?" I answered, "Why yes! They did have Blue Moon on tap."

I kept on with my drunken rambling, "I met some great friends tonight! You know I try to like everybody but all of these people were sincerely awesome people. I wished we could have stayed longer. We need to go next time Monster Mania is in town." Jules said, "It should be in August like the one we went to in August." I continued, "Well then I'm getting a room, so we don't have to worry about monsoons and we can party like rock stars when the ballrooms close. Oh by the way - Dan and I killed a zombie that he had a crush on." My wife said, "Dan and you did what?"


I ignored her and kept going, "This was an epic evening that must be documented. Wait, where is my laptop? It's time to go to the 'Cave"! This will be a new feature post called "DWB: Drunk While Blogging!" Jules said, "That does not sound like a good idea at all. I was like, "Sure it is! Let me just boot my laptop up and I'll...I'll...You know I should call John and Jen and let them know we made it home ok...where's my phone....ZZZZZZ!"

(FADE TO BLACK)


Text fades onto the screen:
"13 Hours Ago at Monster Mania"

(FADE IN)


We arrived at the show a little after 10am. Since Jules had a baby shower to attend to in Allentown, I asked my best friend Dan to come along instead. He watches some movies but is not a horror fanatic, so I was worried whether he would enjoy himself or not. Let's just say things definitely worked out.


We started off in the one of the celebrity ballrooms and it was packed!! Everyone had a decent-sized line except for one of the people I needed to meet on this day: former pro wrestler Al Snow. I used to be very into wrestling up until about 6-7 years ago and Al was one of my favorites! I even went the extra effort to bring a figure of him that I have been holding on to since '99 in the event I ever met him at a signing. I was so excited to finally meet my favorite cult wrestler, but unfortunately he did not seemed the least bit enthused to speak with me. I'm not going to go into it, but let's just say I was probably the most legitimate Al Snow fan in that building and he treated me like he didn't want to talk to me. Guess I shouldn't have been surprised since my Jules told me that she met him years ago before her and I met and how he was really "douchie" toward her. I told her she probably caught him at a bad time in a non-signing environment, but looks like I got played out here.


Me and Al with Head.

After a not so good moment, what could put me in a better mood? Thom Matthews...because he FTW! Dan and I thought this would be two actors down in less five minutes as we jumped in line with only one man and his friend ahead of us. Played out again! I shit you not, we were in line for 20 + minutes while these dudes had Thom sign at least 100 items. I wish I was exaggerating.


This guy was the culprit who gave Thom the hand cramp!

The only thing that kept us entertained was Kane Hodder's non-stop ballbusting of fans and even towards Thom himself at the adjacent table. When it was finally our turn, I told Thom, "Listen I can give you a minute to work out that hand cramp if you need it." He laughed and told me how unexpected that was to sign of all of that stuff. I told him that he can find it on Ebay tomorrow morning. After I told him that I not giving him close to the business he just received from that last guy, I mentioned my adoration for Return of the Living Dead and Friday the 13 Part 6: Jason Lives. Also gave him mad props for hooking up with Kathy Ireland, who was in her prime, in Alien From L.A. No I wasn't being a dick bringing that up...I was serious. He even gave me a "golly"-like smile. At least I didn't bring up Bloodmatch. That's when I got diarrhea of the mouth and mentioned my first date with Jules when I asked what was her favorite Friday. She told me she was a genre fan, so iu asked her as a friendly test. Without missing a beat, she said Part 6 Jason Lives, which you all might know is my favorite entry and not something a liar would immediately say without thinking about it. Strangely enough, it was one of those many sparks on our first date that led to other dates and so on. After getting our picture taken together he told me, "Nice meeting you Geof and thanks for the break. Say hi to your wife for me." Very nice experience.


Thom Matthews still FTW!

Next up was Bill Moseley or who I affectionately call "The Mose". This was my first time meeting him and as an enormous fan, this is someone that I have been really looking forward to meeting for a long time. He had a great variety of items to sign that it made it hard to choose which one I wanted (I went with a Chop-Top pic). I let him know that I enjoy his presence in every film, but that Chop-Top is my favorite character he has played.


I loved this sign.

Also, I mentioned that back in the day before IMDB, I watched Full Moon's Crash and Burn and did not recognize him until the third act when he was revealed as the villain. He started acting all crazy and started sounding like Chop-Top. I revealed to him that I endured the pain called Evil Bong just to see his one minute cameo. He jokingly shook my hand and said I was REALLY a true fan. Then to finish things off, he started yelling "Dog will hunt!" in his genuine Chop-Top voice which made me laugh during our photo. It was really cool hearing that voice live. Finally, I mentioned All-American Massacre and he told me that it does in fact exist and you can probably find it somewhere but he seemed surprised that he would bring it up.


Bill Moseley is the shizzy!

On our way to the other signing ballroom, we went to the hotel desk to ask for a folder to put our signatures in. Just then, Gary Busey came strolling in with his luggage and stood almost right next to us. He looked like he was in a salty mood. Worse than salty. Foul would be a better word. He was saying some weird stuff (of course) to the clerk that I wish I could remember before he stormed off. Guess that was Busey being Busey, lol!


Yes this shot is shit, but he was in motion.

Next we got in a rather large line to meet William Katt, which was not too bad because it was right next to the Full Moon booth. Check these out before I continue...






The Puppets from Puppet Master

I told William Katt how much I still love Greatest American Hero and how I was so bummed how quickly he was killed off Heroes. Then I spoke with him about my "Amateur Hour" review of AVH last summer and how the head of his fan club commented on my blog and told me she showed it to him. He put his head in his hand in disgrace, but in a joking way. To clarify things, I expressed my love of watching horrible films and reviewing them on my blog and that I only watched AVH and House IV because he was in them. He was laughing and it was all good. Then he went back to AVH and complained about how poorly The Asylum treated the entire cast. He only did that film because Deedee Pfeffer was a friend and asked him to do it. Go figure that about The Asylum...I'm not surprised. He recommended a film he was in called The Man From Earth, which is a sci-fi film he labeled "intelligent" but is not getting any airtime due to its lack of special effects. He then continued by saying that "...yet AVH gets played in a prime time slot, which is an awful film but hey...it has special effects." Go figure right? So I figured I'd give a plug for his film and will make sure to check it out for myself real soon.

Not that I thought he'd be an idiot or anything like that, but the man is very intelligent and speaks on a high level about his craft. He also seems to be legitimately "hip" for his age which is something I hope I am when I get older. What a great conversation and real pleasure it was to meet him. Our exchange even led me to see his Q&A session later on in the afternoon.


William Katt: best interaction I ever had with an actor.

Running low on money, Tom Atkins was my last stop for the day. I actually thought he was going to be a bit rough but he was extremely nice to me. We were talking for a bit about some of his films, but my picture with him didn't come out right at all. Then I felt like I took up too much of the man's time and did not ask him to record "Thrill Me" into my phone so I can use it for messages. Oh well! Since my pic came out like crap, here is one that is post worthy for you Atkins fans:


T-ATK!!!


Here are some other pics...



So many good ones to choose from but I went with this Fright Rag.



"Pinhead"Doug Bradley



Malcolm McDowell posed into my camera from afar. Got lucky with that!



A robotic Michael Myers figure



I loved these demon dolls...especially Possessed Ash!



Loved Toxie 4! This is by the Troma table.



New announced sequel! Freddy vs. Jason vs. Geof



Former pro wrestler Greg "The Hammer" Valentine



Bruce Abbott from Re-Animator



We thought this was hilarious.



Just a random life-sized zombie figure



Someone defaced this advertisement. Gotta check that site at some point.



See? I told you we killed a zombie that Dan had a crush on.

Now on to the best part of the day: An impromptu mini blogger meeting!

I have only met up with one blogger (Allison from Allison-Writes) in person before, to a success where we are good friends outside of the electronic world. Johnny (from the extremely awesome
Freddy in Space) and I had been planning to meet up at the show for some time and finally pinpointed the perfect meeting area: the hotel bar, of course. When I arrived at the bar, he was there with the guys (Lance and John) who run Kindertrauma! I was really excited to meet Johnny face-to-face, but I had no idea these guys would be there too. This was great. If you are reading this, you probably already know these guys, but if you do not, please check out their blogs and you will not be disappointed. Must reads.


From L-R, epic awesomeness united: Me, the Kindertrauma guys, Kate and Johnny.

We all engaged in some good conversation for an hour or so, until the
Kindertrauma guys had to leave. Al Snow even came into the bar at one point and I told them all my Snowplow of an experience with him...hardy har-har! Jill Whitlock and Steve Marshall from Night of the Creeps came in at one point as well. Another notable incident included some pack of indie filmmakers who were peddling their wares to us. For some reason named rounds of beer, we bought copies of this film I will not name as of yet, but I will tell you that it has Amateur Hour installment written all over it.


She was helping sell that indie flick that John and I bought.

After giving me the heads up of having Blue Moon on tap, John, his girl Jen, Dan, and I had a few more rounds before heading back to the ballroom so John could get Thom Matthews' autograph. No sooner we got in the room, security kicked us out due to a "medical emergency". We looked around, but couldn't figure out what they were talking about and there was no use talking to the guards because those asshats always think they are state cops. We thought: Must have been Busey...had to have been.
So instead, we went to the Fright Rags table where I picked up the sweetest "OBEY" They Live shirt before taking off for the night. Had it not been for the monsoon-ish weather and the fact that we lived 35 minutes away, we would have partied until the sun came up. Next time, Gadget...next time.


Us after round number...ah who knows?

Not only did we have a great time at the convention and met some cool actors, but the end of the night ended with making new friends outside of the blogger-verse. And hope they feel the same way about me. For me, that was definitely the highlight of this particular convention. I really hope there's another Monster Mania in August.


Dan, Jen and John

Dan and I got a little food in our systems and walked 1/4 of a mile in the monsoon to get back to our cars and had a safe trip home. I decided to pick up some pizza and bring it back for Jules. That's when I headed to the door, excited to tell her all of my experiences tonight, but I admit to still being a little drunk while Dan the warrior was fine. I remember opening the door and then...