Sunday, January 31, 2010
My lovely wife Jules has just bestowed upon me two awards, one of which is The Kick Ass Blogger Award. I want to separate these awards posts because each requires something different, so I will cover the second one tomorrow.
Jules over at Chic & Pink wanted to pass this along to me so she could be the first blogger to give me an award that didn't look too girlie for the Man-Cave. ETMC Note: Girlie or not, I always love, accept and appreciate these awards when my awesome blog buddies send them my way. Check out my sidebar!
The rules for accepting this award is simple:
1) Link back to the person who nominated you for the reward and say a little something about their blog
2) Select 8 bloggers you think are "kick-ass" by linking to them in your post
3) E-mail/tweet/comment on a post on their site or do whatever you need to in order to let your nominees know they have been nominated and to check out your post.
4) Finally - paste the picture of the award in your post.
Here is my acceptance speech (lol):
Thanks to Jules at Chic & Pink for nominating me for the Kick-Ass Blogger Award. Her blog is the anti-Man-Cave, but she speaks on a lot of general topics and is sweet as sweet can be. Definitely check out her blog and join the army of followers she has (367 as I type this!)
Now for my eight Kick-Ass Bloggers, I nominate the following in no particular order...
1) Jesse at Not Worth Mentioning
2) TS Hendrik at The Non-Review
3) Ian at The Daily Dose of Reality
4) Lisa Marie at The Domestication of a Party Girl
5) ASBLACKASOBAMA at I Think It's Interesting
6) Joe over at The Shadow of My Life
7) Kato at Pandorah's Box
8) Ally at Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing
To these eight nominees, thanks for following and participating in my little blog hobby at ETMC! You guys and gals "kick royal fucking ass"!
These are some of my newest followers/followees whose sites have become a daily visiting requirement. You should definitely check them out when you get a chance. Just know that if I missed you: I love you, nothing personal, and there is always next time!
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Hall: "Gerard's not following Harry's Code."
The film takes place in a future where video games reach a new frontier: the characters in the games are real. So basically, normal everyday people control these human characters' movements. Think of yourself playing Super Mario Bros. for example. You are controlling Mario as he jumps and runs swims. But imagine now that Mario is a actually a real person you are controlling somewhere in the middle of the desert in a man-made set. So if you make your Mario jump too soon and he falls to his death in the game, the real man you were controlling dies for real too. Pretty fucked up, huh?
Well this technology is made possible by uber-psycho genius Nick Castle (Micahel C. Hall) who is a media phenomenon due to the creation of his innovative real-life games: Slayers and Society. While Society is like The Sims but with people partying and having sex all of the time, Slayers is Castle's bread and butter which is a bit first person shooter-esque. Gerard Butler plays Kable, who while controlled by a 17-year old kid, is the reigning champ of the Slayers universe. People watch these games live on televisions like spectators sports, so Kable is the fan favorite and his teenager user is a bit of a celebrity in his own rite. Unfortunately for Kable, he has been wrongly imprisoned in the Slayer universe and longs to get out and back to his wife and child. One problem - people who are assigned to play Slayers are death row inmates, so the only way to be free is to die or be given a full pardon if they are able to escape the Slayers battlefield. The latter is virtually impossible.
Ludacris (yup that same one) is in it at a leader of a resistance group out to expose that Castle is not the lovable tech genius he is made out to be. Apparently, Castle is not being honest about who gets thrown into the game for their life sentence. Also, Castle and Kable have some beef with each other but we are not sure what it is exactly until the end, so I won't spoil it here.
Terry Crews and John Leguizamo show up in some interesting roles. And I want to know if Amber Valleta drinks the blood of the young because she is hot as hell in this film. Seriously does the woman age? And I am glad Luda is only in it for a short time. When I saw him pop up in the trailer, I rolled my eyes and feared that he was going to have a larger presence in the film.
Ladies look to the right of this pic and guys look to the lower left
This movie was alright, which is odd for me to not feel passionately about a film one way or the other. I'm not saying it's bad, but it's not the most innovative piece of celluloid I have ever seen either. It had a lot of action and I enjoyed seeing some the gadgets in this futuristic universe at work, but there was just something about the film that felt a little off-base. It definitely was not what I was expecting because it is played straight yet a little weird at the same time. And I say that in a good way! There were also some homages to Blade Runner that were pretty funny and Michael C. Hall was excellent as the film's antagonist.
If you like action mixed with science-fiction and don't mind a little weirdness, this is a film you should check out. The writer/directors are the same team behind the Crank films which I enjoy, so if you like those films then you have to see this one as well. A recommendation to the filmmakers is to make a film about the Society universe because that would be the greatest game ever if it was real!
One final note: there was one scene that had me laughing my ass off and is by far the most memorable scene in the film in my opinion. Amber Valleta, who plays Kable's wife Angie, works in the Society game as a human character. Her user guides her into a whacked out club where she meets another human character named Rick Rape played hilariously by Heroes' Milo Ventimiglia. Maybe it is not meant to be hilarious, but the sight of Peter Petrelli where some tight ass pleather outfit, laughing maniacally and trying to score with Valleta's ass is a sight to behold. Hats off to you Milo! Please see below for Peter Petrelli awesomeness...
Friday, January 29, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
How are you today? Hope all is well with you and your family? I hope this mail meets you in a perfect condition. I am using this opportunity to thank you for your great effort to our unfinished transfer of fund into your account due to one reason or the other best known to you.
But I want to inform you that I have successfully transferred the Cheque out of the company to someone else who was capable of assisting me in this great venture.
Due to your effort sincerity courage and trust worthiness you showed at the course of the transaction I want to compensate you and show my gratitude to you with the sum of $900000.00 (Nine hundred Thousand United States Dollars) I have authorized the finance house where I deposited my money to issue you international certified bank draft cashable at your bank.
My dear friend I will like you to contact the finance house for the collection of this international certified bank draft. The name and contact address of the Person with your Cheque Dr John David is as follows.
CONTACT NAME: Dr John David
At the moment I am very busy here because of the investment projects which myself and my new partner are having at hand. Finally remember that I have forwarded instruction to the finance house on your behalf to send the bank draft to you as soon as you contact them without delay.You are to contact him with the following information.
1.Your Full Name;
2.Your Home Address:
3.Your Telephone Number:
4.Your Place of Work and Address:
5.Your Email Address:
Please I will like you to accept this token with good faith as this is from the bottom of my heart. Thanks and God bless you and your family. You should also know that you will be paying for the delivery of your cheque.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Mrs. Patricia Lawal
Can I call you Patty? Great!
Thanks for reminding me about not finishing this bank account fund transaction. You know I still haven't kicked that AJAX-snorting fetish of mine and those blackouts keep happening right along with them.
Yeah I can contact the Finance House. Do you know if they have an extra room where I can crash the next time I go on my AJAX bender. I don't need much, just a room and floor. Hell I'll take the closet if need be.
Where was I? AJAX? No. Right - money. Thanks for spelling out what $900000.00 is in words. Because you know I have problems putting commas in money amounts. Oh wait - no that's you. My bad.
Ok so all I have to do is pay for the cheque...doh! Now you got me doing it! It's check, dammit! Check!
"From the bottom of your heart?" "Good Faith?" "God bless you and your family?" You know that if there is a hell, you are building a mansion down there trying to take advantage of computer-illiterate and elderly people right? So with that being said...
GFY with a chainsaw,
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
I asked Jules all nonchalantly, "Hey, so umm, who is that?" - which I guess was not so nonchalant as I was met with rolled eyes and an, "Ew! That's Tanith Belbin." Maybe I should have made more comments earlier that were not so disparaging, I would have gotten away with it.
The best part is that she trains with her partner Ben Agosto in Aston, PA which is like 20 minutes from me. Maybe I will take the wife and I on a field trip to watch her train in person.
Now when ice skating is turned on, so am I.
Thanks for reading my stalker post!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
How can you make a bad game where you play as Leatherface and chop up teens? See this game...
Believe it or not I played this game (on a ROM) and boy does it suck. These graphics are bad even for Atari standards.
Check out Angry Video Game Nerd's hilarious review:
Halloween (Wizard Video; Atari; 1983)
Much better than TCM, which is not hard to be. Another I tried via ROM. They even kept Carpenter's original score but it gets annoying after some time.
Another AVGN funny review:
Frankenstein's Monster (Atari)
Not technically based on a horror film, but close enough. Another played via ROM. Fun but very repetitive.
Monday, January 25, 2010
FOX wants someone who has a proven track record to do a stable and successful late night talk show day in and day out, so who would be a better free agent than O'Brien. There are a couple of other networks interested in Conan's services, but obviously he is going to a situation with the most exposure and best potential quality of work.
In the meantime, let's enjoy the CoCo reruns while they last...
Source: 411mania.com - one of my favorite sites!
Monster Mania coming to Cherry Hill, NJ in March and I cannot wait to go. I had to miss the last two years because of my travel schedule, but I am going to put in the time off tomorrow and get my tickets asap. I might even go all-out and do the whole V.I.P. package.
Guests are still early in the making, but confirmed so far: Doug Bradley, the cast of Night of the Creeps is going to be there, Bruce Abbott, the cast from the original My Bloody Valentine, William Katt, Gary Busey, Eric Roberts, Greg "The Hammer" Valentine, Mark Patton and many more. The lineup isn't like a home run or anything, but confirmed attendees are still in the early stages. Can't wait to see who else gets added.
While it is cool to get autographs and pictures with the guests, one of the main draw for me is to look at the vendor tables for horror trinkets and collectibles. Last time, I got a copy of Versus, Battle Royale and Ringu 2. And I won a copy of the Freddy vs. Jason soundtrack which was crap but it was free. It's my beer coaster now.
My wife introduced this to me when I first moved back to Philly in '05 and we went for the whole Saturday where we got to meet Robert Englund, Andrew Brezynski, Heather Langenkamp, Amanda Wyss, Sid Haig and some more that I can't remember off hand. Didn't mean to ramble.
Is anyone else planning to attend? If so, it would be great to meet up in person. If you are attending, please shoot me an e-mail.
Here is the link if anyone wants to attend the con:
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Ethan Hawke plays Edward Dalton, a hemotologist at a pharma company working to find a blood substitute with human blood running out fast. While the company, headed by evil corporate owner Charles Bromley (Sam Neill), is working towards a solution to the human blood crisis and promotes themselves as trying to perserve the human race, they are harvesting humans for their blood behidn the scenes. Literally harvesting - they have humans hooked up to machines that only keep them breathing and producing blood.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
"You Know the Rules!"
Spiral finally made it's way up my queue and into my DVD player. Someone gave me a heads-up to NOT expect anything like Hatchet, which is a good thing, but that was all of the knowledge I had before viewing.
The film begins with a man who makes a desperate late night phone call to a friend. It is implied that the caller has murdered a young waitress that he was gawking at in the previous scene. The next day we learn that the caller is a disturbed young telemarketer named Mason (Joel David Moore) and the person he called was his boss and longtime friend Berkeley (Zachary Levi).
Mason meets a new hire Amber (Amber Tamblyn) who really makes a quick connection with the introvert. After seeing the picture he sketched of presumed murdered waitress, Amber asks Mason to sketch her which he agrees to do. As their relationship begins to get serious, Mason begins to be haunted by dreams and visions of the dead waitress. The whole time Berkeley seems to be his only link to sanity, but something just is not right with Mason. He might be a reclusive man with eerie illusions or a demented killer. Watch to find out for yourself.
"Why couldn't I have been the damn Na'vi hero instead of Jake?"
Viewers be warned: This is not a horror film, but rather a psychodrama. The co-direction of Green and Moore is excellent, but the slow pacing might turn off a majority of filmgoers...especially those who might be expecting something along the lines of Hatchet. In fact, this film and that one are like night and day. There is no humor or black comedy and zero gore to be found here.
Now that those possible pre-notions have been reported, let me continue by saying that this was a pretty good film and you should check it out. This film reminded me of Love Object in the way of its premise, minus the love doll stuff, and characters but that's a really good thing. However the overall film is its "own". There's not a lot of action or thrills and you don't really know what's going on until the very end.
The acting for this level of film was spectacular. Of course Joel David Moore (pwns) and Amber Tamblyn are pretty versatile thesbians, but I was shocked by Zachary Levi's performance. I am no fan of Levi or that show NBC attempts to cram down everyone's throat Chuck. That might be the stem of my dislike for him, but that is over now...he was fantastic and completely believable as Mason's best friend Berkeley.
"Geof, you don't like Chuck?! F*** you, asshat!"
I recommend this one but again, please understand this is not a horror film. It has a slow pace because it is focused more on story. It has ups and downs and twists and turns but kept me in for the long haul. I thought I figured things out at the halfway point but boy was I wrong. I just love when films throw me curveballs. Add in some beautiful cinematography of Portland, Oregon along with the acting and story...and you've got a winner.
I always love to hear readers' comments, so I hope to hear from those who have seen this film to give their views about this one. good or bad.
- In this film, Zachary Levi looks like Carson Daly and Jesse Metcalfe's love child. And his character is the only person I know that loves finishing out a game of hoops with a Marlboro light.
- Amber Tamblyn is with romantically linked with comedian David Cross who is 20 years her senior. I like how you roll, Mr. Cross. I like it indeed.
- Speaking of Amber, there is a certain cute factor that has always attracted me to her, even though she has Vulcan ears. This film has several shots that really expose that fact.
- Moore does a great job with the triple threat here as lead actor, co-director and screenwriter.
CBS has to know that Leno and those pricks at The 'Cock are going to pull out all of the stops to take out Letterman on Leno's first night back. Leno NEEDS a huge first night because that will set the trend for the rest of his time on the air into motion. So how is the best way to shut down Leno right out of the gate? Easy...
PUT CONAN O'BRIEN ON YOUR SHOW AS LETTERMAN'S FIRST GUEST AND TRASH THE HELL OUT OF NBC!
Then it's a done deal.
CBS, I expect a percentage of funds if you use this idea. At least plug Enter the Man-Cave or something!
Friday, January 22, 2010
- Jay Leno's 10pm show was a failure and Conan's rating could not get over-the-hump and beat Letterman
- NBC tells Conan to move to 12:05am so Leno could move to 11:35pm, meaning that Jimmy Fallon would move to 1:05am and Carson Daly would...well no one watches that shit anyways.
- Conan tells NBC to go FUCK themselves, so NBC uses a legal loophole to force Conan out
- Team CoCo is made in support of CoCo
- Leno acts like he is Mr. Innocent when he is really a conniving little fuck. Jimmy Kimmel goes on his show and TRASHES him. More A-list celebrities follow suit in support of Team CoCo
- Conan announces he is leaving and goes into negotiations to exit NBC
- NBC stalls negotiations by making sure that Conan cannot talk bad about the network while on the network and not host a late night talk show (like on FOX) until Sept 1, 2010
- Conan goes on his talk show and decides to sing a negative song about NBC ("Incompetent Morons") since legally he cannot SAY anything bad about them. Then he bashes Jay Leno because, again, he is a conniving fuck. The next night he bashes them again, but this time in Espanol.
- Conan (and his legal team) spends an enormous amount of time for negotiating one last demand: a huge severance pay for the rest of his staff.
- NBC agreed on paying this rather large severance on two conditions: 1) He never says or sings anything bad about them again while on NBC 2) This is his last "demand"
- It is announced that Conan will walk away with $33 million and $12 million gets paid out to his staff
- Conan keeps his promise by having special surprise guests on the show to bash NBC for him. And he spends NBC's budget money to buy extravagant things just to waste their money.
- Conan tells his audience that he is in "showbiz" and that we should concentrate on real tragedies in the world like Haiti. He will be "just fine" because he is getting a lot of money for doing nothing.
This last thing speaks a lot about Conan O'Brien. In the end, he lost his "dream job" he worked so hard to obtain and appreciated his fans' supports, but there are far worse things to worry about in the world. And the fact that his legal misery was dragged out for so long just so he could take care of his staff is incredible. Anytime your employer goes to bat for you, you should follow that man into any war because employers like that are extremely rare at nay level in any industry. I remember that when the writers' strike happened two-three years ago, O'Brien paid his staff out of his own pocket. Leno, who made far more money at the time, didn't pay his staff anything. I know that is not suprising at all.
I grew to like Conan because he is not your standard talk show, but because he was the Carson (Johnny not Daly) of my generation. I liked Letterman too, but Conan was younger and came off hipper...for about as him as someone who looks like Conan can be. There were many late nights drinking when I was in college where my friends and I would watch Conan while throwing some brews back and laughed our asses off. He was fucking funny! On the night's we stayed in, we would watch Letterman and then Conan.
When it was announced that Conan was going to take over for Leno five years ago, I did backflips because now I didn't have to stay up so late to watch Conan. It would be nice to have some laughs from Conan before hitting the sack. As time got closer, I was counting down the days. Then it seemed like forever until he made his debut in the summer. Andy Richter was back too and I was so happy. The original band got back together again!
Now this shit happens. I'm not worried for Conan, trust me, but I'm upset for ME! I thought my days of leaving Leno on as I waited for Conan to come on were over. Sometimes when I travel, watching Conan and then Jimmy Fallon would be a great way to end the day. I'm going to miss Conan! This sucks!
Basically, NBC f'd this up in so many ways and let me list my reasons why:
- First of all, what the hell kind of dirt does Leno have on these guys anyway? Does he have pics of them fucking donkeys and sheep? Does he give a great bj or something? He really is not funny at all and now he will lose the ratings war with Letterman and really hurt NBC more financially then they have been already. Why? See the next bullet...
- Conan supporters will NEVER, EVER watch that station during that time slot again. Do you think I was the only one that kept Leno's show on in the background while I was websurfing or something and waited for Conan to come on? Hell no. Jay is going to lose some serious numbers right there. There is no reason to leave that channel on at all now. If I want to see Fallon's show, I can DVR and watch it tomorrow. Too bad because Fallon's show was growing on me, being someone who was not a big fan to begin with.
- Conan supporters are going to flock to Letterman just to bury Leno. Especially since Letterman has totally supported Conan through this mess because it's like Deja Vu for him.
- Leno's PR has been ruined. He has tried too hard to defend himself on that 10pm waste of time he has had on for the last 4 months and rip NBC...and his rips at NBC are as a fake as Heidi Montag's new face.
- Leno started taking personal shots at Letterman's character for his recent infidelity issues. He is trying to start some war with Letterman in a pathetic attempt at gaining some viewership when he returns, but this is a major backfire. Letterman put his heart on his sleeve, fessed up to his wrongdoings on his show and was very genuine about it (unlike a certain pro golfer). Ironically, his honesty buried that scandal quickly and got more viewers to his show and away from Conan. Everyone forgave and now loves Letterman again, so Leno looks like a real dick taking personal shots at him. Letterman just kept his shots concentrated to Leno's professional life.
- NBC looks like a shit network in general right now. Their company looks like a freaking joke and Conan has increased this to the fullest. We are not hearing the real reasons why he got forced out, like how Leno wants his slot back because he failed at 10 and looks like a loser. In typical dickfuck Leno fashion, he will throw anyone under the bus that gets in his way. That happened with for Conan, Letterman, Carson and even Howard Stern. At least TMZ credits Howard for the "Guess the Jew" game they have been doing recently. And Leno stole "Stuttering" John Melendez...which also backfired on Leno. Not to mention that Jaywalking one of the oldest bits Howard has ever done...stopping lying all the time, Jay. It's not a good look.
So as a Conan fan, I am pissed that this went down. And I feel horrible that his poor staff uprooted their lives to move out west. I am glad that Conan went the extra mile to take care of them the best he could. And you know that Conan is going to end up somewhere else by September 2010 and guess who he's bringing along? Exactly.
Here's to hoping that Conan and his staff can take their game to somewhere else in 8-9 months and keep the late night market competitive. And here's hoping that big-chinned, unfunny piece if shit Leno and NBC get exactly what they deserve: zero ratings and another failure.
Adios Conan, Andy, Max, Year 3000, Masturbating Bear...
Congratulations to Emme Toaye of Gothic Soul Retreat / mystic2awesome for winning a $25 Best Buy gift card from ENTER THE MAN-CAVE!!!!!
I was going to borrow a blogger friend's idea and use my webcam to show me use the random generator to select the winner, but my job still has not sent one to me. So MAJOR FAIL there.
Thanks to EVERYONE who participated. I am going to do another one soon, so be on the lookout for that.
To the WINNER Emme: please e-mail your address to me at firstname.lastname@example.org, so I can get this gift card out to to you.
I'm not an American Idol fanatic, but I thought this was hilarious and wanted to share. Just give him a few seconds to get going. Yeah I know it's old now, but it's still funny as fuck!
Now I can't get this damn song out of my head!
Thursday, January 21, 2010
At the start of season three, Dex was on top of the world but this season he starts in a major slump. Exhaustion prevents him from collecting his "trophies" and his usual type A personality starts to slack. He's messing up his blood splatter evidence in court, falling asleep at inconveinent times and losing bodies before he gets to his boat. Yeah that last one is a woozy! Rita finds out that Dex did not get rid of his apartment (because he needs to keep his trophies somewhere safe) which leads them to marriage counseling.
Dex has to figure out what he wants to be: a serial killer or a family man. He wants to be both, but Harry tells him it is impossible to balance both. Dex strives for some normality in his bizarre world, but the only thing that matters is if he can do it or not.
"Careful with that axe, Eugene. I mean Dexter."
What you read above was typed up on Friday evening. I say this because of the following: Not that I ever use awards shows to pass judgment on any film or program, but the performances of John Lithgow and Michael C. Hall just earned them Golden Globe awards for Best Supporting Actor and Best Lead Actor last Sunday. This might help to visualize just how good the acting is in season four and why should not miss it. And Hall pulled off this kind of performance fighting cancer to no one's knowledge? WOW!!
"Dude we are SO going to win Golden Globes in a few months."
The final thing to say here is ...when does season five get here?!
Bonus Bits is canceled due to avoiding all major spoilers. Again, I wish I could have written so much more, but to do that would be to ruin the season. And had I watched season four a week sooner, this would have been the winner of the ETMC "IT" award for best series.
Not that I think Michael C. Hall or his family frequents the Man-Cave, especially after the "Face-in-Hole" abortions I have been throwing up there, but I do wish him a full and speedy recovery. And congrats on your well deserved GG! Thanks to everyone for reading and commenting on this four part set. Now it's back to some more zaniness on ETMC.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Your odds are good since I only have like 10 contestants who have entered thus far.
Click here to enter: http://enterthemancave.blogspot.com/2009/12/etmcs-after-holidays-giveaway.html
or click on the $25 bill in the sidebar------------------->
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Desi was always a funny mofo co-worker and used to make me laugh my ass off on a daily basis back in the day. So I am excited to post this video here on ETMC.
But he doesn't need my endorsement. Shit this was on CNN and apparently he was interviewed on there as well. Had I known that, I would have slipped him some payola to drop a plug for ETMC.
Anyways, watch this video because:
1) it's my bud
2) it's f'n high-larious!
And then ask yourself if HP computers really are racist. I'm sold on the fact!! Desi Cryer is not a liar...I'm a poet and didn't know it.
Monday, January 18, 2010
THIS SEASON IS TWO YEARS OLD SO YEAH THERE'S GONNA BE SOME SPOILERS.
"I've lived in darkness a long time. Over the years my eyes adjusted until the dark became my world and I could see ."
Season three begins with things back to normal for Dexter, well as normal for someone like Dexter can be. With Doakes taking the fall for being the Bay Area Butcher and Lila 86'ed, Dex is able to go back to his favorite hobby.
The serial killer serenity he experiences doesn't last for too long when Dex accidentally kills the wrong person during a botched ritual attempt. To make things worse, the person Dexter did kill is the younger brother of Miami's Assistant D.A. Miguel Prado (played the awesome Jimmy Smits) - meaning that resolving this case is going to be a high priority. The police decide that Dex's original target, Freebo, is the one responsible for the younger Prado brother murder which complicates Dex's continued pursuit of him.
Dex finally tracks down and kills Freebo, but is caught in the act by Miguel. Instead of turning Dex in for murder, Miguel embraces Dex for killing his brother's supposed killer and winds up forming a bond with Dex. In fact, he does everything he can to force a friendship between them, like making Rita and his wife close friends as well. Too bad Freebo is not the killer Dex was looking for when in fact it was another murderer, nicknamed the Skinner. The Skinner is the mysterious main story arch killer that is pursued by the police force through the entire season once they figure out that Freebo is not the murderer they are looking for.
After Prado learns about Dex's killing sprees, Prado actually endorses and supports Dex's vigilante behavior. Harry killed himself once he saw what Dex actually was inside, but Prado actually accepts Dex for who he truly is. It is the first time Dex has experienced a real friendship while being his true self, which is something he never had the pleasure of enjoying before. The inner conflict between remaining loyal to Harry's code and having openness with someone he barely knows eventually leads Dex to strengthen his friendship with Prado to BFF territory. In fact, Dex asks him to be his best man at the wedding. Their friendship hits a major peak so quickly and that allows Dex to feel comfortable enough to teach Prado the code and bring him along for the rituals.
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
DISCLAIMER: THIS IS 100% GENUINE SPAM SCAM MAIL.
This is one I received from BMWAutomobile this morning...
Dear Email Owner,
This is to inform you that your email address has won the payment of
450,000GBP along with a 5series BMW car from this year promo draws of the BMW
GROUP.Send Below informations for claims:
Email: (omitted email address)
Tel: (omitted telephone number)
I apologize that my e-mail address contacted you without letting me know. My e-mail address has been warned by me before to let me know whenever he wants to enter any contests, especially since my e-mail address is only seven years old and clearly underage. I have punished him for such behavior and he won't be contacting you in the future.
But I must admit that I am certainly impressed with the technological advancements in today's age. I am simply amazed that BMW automobiles have progressed up the evolutionary chain to actually be able to send e-mails. And give away over half a million U.S. Dollars to boot!
I would love to take advantage of this offer, so let me send you my information:
1234 Mockingbird Lane
2034 Light Years Old
Look forward to getting my money and the BMW so I can retire and watch porn all day long uninterrupted.
GFY with a chainsaw,
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Jeepers Creepers, Where'd ya get them...oh nevermind
Slash is a film about a band who gets stranded on a secluded farm while attending a funeral of the main character's aunt. Soon they get stalked, or should I say slashed? And it is not as cool as it sounds. So I created a little cinematic recipe for this film:
1) Take Hard Rock Zombies, Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare and Texas Chainsaw Massacre
2) Drain the zombies, get rid of Hitler and suck out camp
3) Dump any and all comedy
4) Add an attempt at straight horror
5) Bake for 101 minutes and serve, but then be ready to throw the dish back up.
Slash begins with an intriguing opening scene, but then falls faster than a prostitute's panties. First we meet the band Slash (hence the title), whose music makes them sound like they should be called Infinite Sorrow instead. The band's name just does not match the alternative, mellow music they put out. Holy Moses' tunes in HRZ were harder than this stuff. A band with a name like Slash, should be hardcore and crazy. Not singing songs that echo Radiohead's Creep.
After meeting the lame protagonists we are stuck with for the film's duration, this film seems like it purposely tries to put you to sleep. We are "treated" to a non-menacing killer who looks like he was dragged right out of Jeepers Creepers, especially the sequel due to the whole cornfield element. We are also given a very low body count with mere drops of blood for a film called Slash, off-screen kills, a predictable twist at the end, and a bad stereotype.
The bad stereotype, I just mentioned is the "angry back man" one. The film's only black character Keith (Craig Kirkwood) gets all angry and starts waving his gun around once his spiffy sneakers get stolen. Everyone else has a pretty calm demeanor except for his character and he loses his shit when his sneakers get lifted. It is flat out ridiculous. What's also ridiculous is that the dude's teeth are more capped than a salary cap. More capped than Tiger Woods. More capped than Matt Dillon in There's Something About Mary. They are that distractingly bad. And then he gets tagged with the "angry black" stereotype to make matters way worse.
I have already talked too much about this film. Slash looked like it was going to be some goofy fun, but wound up being the polar opposite instead. This film is played 100% straight and any supposed humor is strictly unintentional.
- Steve Railsback (Helter Skelter) is the best thing about this movie
- The opening scene peaked my interest
- Keith's Baba Booey teeth
- It's all downhill after the opening scene
- The silliest name for an alt band
- The music from the alt band
- Low body count and no blood
- A lame villain
- The tension between certain members that drops in from out of the blue
- The horrible stereotype
I give this film a "FAILCROW"
Avoid. You've seen this type of film before and you've seen it done better. Sesame Street is scarier.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
A friend is supposed to help me repair my laptop tomorrow or Thursday if the malware damage is not too bad. Right now things look BLEAK!
So wish me luck because I could be out of a laptop...
Monday, January 11, 2010
Sunday, January 10, 2010
SPOILERS AHOY, MATEY!
Season Two picks up about 38 days after the events of the final episode in season one. Deb Morgan (Jennifer Carpenter) is on sick leave to recover from her near-death experience with the Ice Truck Killer while Dexter (Michael C. Hall) cannot bring himself to perform any rituals due to the grief of killing his brother Matt/Rudy Cooper. To make matters worse for Dex, he is constantly being followed by Sgt. James Doakes (Erik King) based on Dex's hidden connection to the ITK case. To make matters even worse than that, Dex has to lie about being a drug user to his girlfriend Rita (Julie Benz) in order to escape being caught in a lie that sent her abusive ex-husband Paul back to jail last season. And the icing on the cake? Dexter's secret stash of his multiple victims are discovered at the bottom of the Atlantic by divers on sunken ship exploration. Basically, Dex starts off the season in a major hole and one that he cannot see himself escaping.
His victims' discovery creates the major angle for the rest of the season as the search begins for the Bay Harbor Butcher (Dexter), who is hyped as a bigger serial killer than the Ice Truck Killer (Matt/Rudy). The scope of the investigation is so big in fact that the F.B.I. are brought in to head the case, led by Special Agent Lundy (played by genre vet Keith Carradine). Paranoia begins to set in for our protagonist as all potential case momentum leads things closer and closer to revealing him as The Bay Harbor Butcher.
In the meantime, Dex attends rehab in an effort to cover up his lie about Paul's wrongful arrest and meets a hottie sponsor named Lila (Jamie Murray). Lila manipulates Dex into a sultry relationship thus axing his current one with Rita. We soon learn that Rita is a crazy, obsessive chick with a penchant for fire once Dex realizes that his heart belongs to Rita and tries to win her back.
As season two gets moving into full gear, Lundy and Deb get romantically involved (she has serious daddy issues), Dex tricks Doakes into getting suspended from the force, Dex and Rita's relationship goes on the mend, crazy Lila does everything in her power to get Dex back, and Dex locates his mother's killer. As you can see, there are a lot of moving parts this time around making for a chaotic season to enjoy.
Dex has to jump through hoop after hoop in order to dodge every obstacle in his way. And it's funny how all of these moving parts are able to align by the last couple episodes and get Dex out of a seemingly inescapable predicament. It is a shame that someone as genuinely as good of a person deep down inside like Doakes had to be killed off the show. He was a real hard ass, don't get me wrong, but he was always trying to do what was best according to his own 'legal" code. Guess his death might be viewed as comeuppance due to his killing of innocent people in the past even if they were in the name of the law. At least he went down swinging and that was a great final tribute to his character.
Season 2 was close to being as good as its predecessor due to a well-developed story that moved at a perfect pace. There just seemed like no plausible way that Dexter was going to escape being fingered as the Butcher with too many things snowballing against him since the first episode. It seemed that Dexter was perfect and untouchable in the first season, so it was interesting to see what would happen when things didn't go exactly as planned. Every episode contained several instances where it seemed that the jig was up for Dex but somehow he was able to deflect the attention somewhere else.
What really separates the first two seasons is the emergence of Dexter's humanity. In the first season, his voice-overs explained to the audience that he felt no compassion or care for anyone except for maybe Deb and that Rita was only a cover for him to blend in. She was a damaged person that he could easily keep his distance from since she had intimacy issues. This season, his genuine love for Rita and the kids become evident in his attempt to win her back after his fling with Lila. That really humanized his character and I think the creators needed to do that. His character needs to continues to evolve somewhat over time or he is going to be as repetitive and predictable of a character like Monk in that USA series.
ETMC Score: out of 5
- It's too bad that Doakes had to bite the bullet, because he was a great character that kept Dex on his toes. Then you got to see a softer side of him but only right before Lila blew up the cabin. Of course his exit leads to Desmond Harrington (who pwns) coming aboard in his place, so that's a positive.
- Season 2 keeps the series on a high, but things take a bit of dip in season 3. More on that next time...