The Old Century Baseball Game:
Because kids would love this so much more than an MLB video game on the PS3 or XBOX 360. Yeah buy your child this if you really want to piss them off. Sound effects, graphics and real-life game simulations - who needs that when you can play with a rolling ball in a wooden box? Poof!
SKYREST:
Could you imagine if this asshole sat next to you in a plane and whipped this out? If he sat next to me, this would somehow "mysteriously" get a hole in it. Look how much space it takes up! Even you are sitting in first class.
RELAX AND NAP PILLOW:
Hehehe...just the right angle I like my women in. Of course if he stays asleep during the process, then I have more problems to worry about than a sick mind.
BEER DISPENSER WITH TAP:
This is picture that comes in the item's description. Apparently you can get girls like this if you have this tap, but I'm not sure that I want this type of women. Why you ask? Even if you aren't asking, I'm still warning you...
Geof's Rule #342: NEVER, EVER HOOK UP WITH A WOMAN WEARING A SCARF INDOORS. THAT MEANS YOU ARE GETTING A "TRANNY SURPRISE" BECAUSE SHE/HE'S COVERING HIS/HER ADAM'S APPLE.
THE ORIGINAL PHILADELPHIA CHEESESTEAK:
If you don't live in the Philly area and you want to have an original Philly Cheesesteak, keep looking. Why would anyone trust food from the SKYMALL? How long do you think that stuff has been in storage? This is "DIARRHEA" written all over it. Look at the picture...this looks about as appetizing as poop smeared on the toilet seat. AVOID!
7 comments:
I never thought of that tranny-scarf connection... now I must remain even MORE vigilant about chicks in scarves! ha. And really? I think that Philly sandwich thing looks kinda good... but maybe that's just 'cuz I haven't had my breakfast yet...
God, that sandwich looks good! You just won an award at http://scaresarah.blogspot.com/ !
Is that even the right kind of cheese for a cheesesteak? I'm no expert, but I thought it was white.
I like how they have it sitting on liberty bell stamps so you know it's offical.
J - If you ever come to the Philly-area, I will personally buy you a real deal Philly Cheeseteak. And ALWAYS watch out for the scarf.
Sarah - Thanks!! Another award!! I'll head to your blog and check it out soon.
JLG - Lots of people get Cheese Whiz on their cheesesteaks as that is tagged the "official" way to eat it. I always prefer American cheese though. Yeah the Liberty Bell is such a nice touch huh? (rolls eyes) lol!
AH! Sometimes I wear my scarf indoors! That explains SOOOO much...
I'm planning a roadtrip with the boy to have a real true Philly cheesesteak. We'll have to get together!
Thanks for the love Geof, it means a lot. For the record, I'm always poking around your blog too, though I tend to read more than comment. You have made our day!
-M'hael
Holy crap, I'm sorry to be back-commenting on your old posts, but geez, you write some damn funny stuff!! The nap pillow part must be my favorite, but the scarf is a really close 2nd!
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